Transitions

(Alaina)

Hello!

This week started off with an unexpected bang. Last period on Tuesday was a “class discussion,” during which the class threw a party for me. Lauren’s class didn’t have anything planned, so she ended up joining me. The party started with Chinese tongue twisters that Lauren and I were forced to try, and then we demonstrated some English tongue twisters that the students tried. We played two rounds of charades, one with me guessing and one with Lauren guessing. I was guessing jobs, such as butcher, midwife, and “cleaner,” while Lauren guessed famous people, such as Marylyn Monroe, Obama (the student acting just said “black” and looked awkward for a minute before Lauren got it), and Michael Jackson.

Now, I expected that the class would give me something small as a going-away gift, and I was right; they gave me a class shirt, which every student in the class has. What I didn’t expect was the onslaught of gifts that continued pouring in. There were probably 25 students who each bought me something. The first girl to give a gift also asked for a hug, so after that they came up one by one to exchange a gift for a hug. This did get dicey for the few boys who got me gifts... the first one I’ve talked to a few times, and he got me a beautiful fan/holder set in one of those pretty Chinese boxes. As this was an especially elaborate gift, of course I gave him a hug too… and a chorus of giggles and muffled shrieks ensued. (It’s funny… the relationship between high school boys and girls is about equivalent to that of American middle schoolers.) I’m not sure if this was socially correct, but I didn’t know what else to do. The next boy got also got an awkward hug, again to the great amusement of the class, and the last boy gave his gift at arms length before running back to his seat. The runner who refused a hug also gave the most incredible gift- a paper swan made out of a zillion tiny paper folds that he made himself over an entire summer vacation. In the accompanying note, which was so sweet, he said he had made it several years ago, but was unable to find its new owner until now. Other gifts include: elaborate beaded handbag, panda bottle opener, ceramic angel, Hello Kitty hourglass, mini Beijing Opera masks, wooden kitty with fishing pole, Buddha necklace, tiny teapot, stuffed tiger。。。 and the list goes on. I was absolutely stunned! I assumed there was some agreement or at least suggestion that people were supposed to bring me gifts, but Ling is positive that there wasn’t, and everyone just decided to bring one on his own. She told me it’s because I’m “very popular in the class”… but I haven’t done anything to deserve so much!! The only time I’m in their class is during lessons I don’t understand, when I silently read. Between classes only a few students regularly talk to me, while the rest are too shy or too busy with school work. I honestly can’t understand it very well. I try very hard to seem approachable and start conversation with everyone, but many of my classmates never reciprocated. Plenty of students didn’t give gifts, so why did the ones who never talked to me still give one? I’m not sure if they felt culturally obligated out of politeness or if they really wanted to give me something and were presumably just too shy to talk more. I’ve just never been in a situation like that! Needless to say, I grew more and more flustered as the pile at my feet grew, and all I could think to do was give bigger hugs!

The rest of the week passed without special event until we got to Friday (my blog day) and of course moving day. As our last hurrah we went out after school with our host siblings, Ning’s friend Bella, and Hong Ye, the senior I talked about in an earlier blog (she got into UCLA, by the way!! I’m so happy for her!). Originally the plan was to go ice skating, but that somehow morphed (perhaps for the better) into playing pool. We went to a giant arcade / pool room that seems to be a popular student hang-out spot. Several of our members, American and Chinese, had never played pool before, so our games included numerous scratches, several balls flying off the table, and frequent laughter. Ling and I were picked up to go to a fancy dinner with six or so of her mom’s friends. It wasn’t exactly my ideal last dinner, since the friends showed didn’t speak English and showed no interest in me, but there were good garlic potatoes. :)

From the restaurant we drove back to Ling’s big apartment, where I packed the last of my things. Given the massive load of gifts I’ve received here, my bag is bulging to say the least. I know that people usually buy another bag to go home, and until recently I didn’t know why. I certainly haven’t bought enough to warrant another piece of luggage, but now I know where at least half of that acquired weight comes from! My new host parents arrived quickly, and after brief goodbyes, we drove to my new home.

 I have to admit, at this point I wish we were staying with one family the whole time. I feel like I had just fully settled into my first family. The communication between Ling and I has improved tremendously, and it’s just now that we’re really in tune. It takes at least two weeks to make a great friend- to learn how to joke with each other and when to stay quiet- and I’m sad that I’ll now see her much less. I can definitely appreciate the value of experiencing life in two different families, but it’s just so exhausting to start over- to learn the ins and outs of a new family, to reintroduce myself to a new set of classmates... I think the result will be many good friends rather than a few great ones, and if I had a choice now, I would pick the latter.

That being said, so far so good! I’m staying with the Li family, which consists of a mother, father, and my host sister Yimei. They live in an apartment near the school that’s also perfectly comfortable, if a bit smaller and less shiny than Ling’s. They don’t have an extra bedroom, so I’m staying in Yimei’s room while she sleeps on a cot in another room... I’d rather not evict her from her room, but sleeping on the cot myself was not an option. Her bed is admitedly very big and comfy. My only house-related complaint (thank god it’s warm outside and heat is no longer necessary!) is that the bathroom door is decently translucent glass... this confuses me.

My host parents are both professors of Chinese medicine in a university. The father apparently writes and reads English excellently, but doesn’t speak it or understand much speech. Nonetheless, we can somewhat communicate- perhaps we’ll have a written conversation soon. Yimei speaks with especially good structure and grammar, though I’ve already figured out that she often pretends to understand me when she doesn’t really. I’m sure we’ll become more in sync with time. She seems to be less affectionate and outgoing than Ling, but maybe she just needs to get comfortable first. She’s is extremely thoughtful (Today: do you like coconut juice? Uhh, yes. *a whole jug of coconut milk and a stack of cups magically pops out of her backpack*). While I’m partially inclined to say that the black-hold backpack is quite convenient, all things considered, I hope she stops treating me with such special attention. This family dotes on my every need to a thoroughly unnecessary extent. Yimei is constantly apologizing for everything, and the family asks me what I want for every meal so they can plan around me. I want everyone to relax! Every time Yimei has trouble saying something, she looks just as flustered as I felt during my gift extravaganza!

Well, that’s all for now.

More updates on the host family soon.

Thanks for reading,